Citizen 125 Bearohn

Bearohn has been struggling with nightmares for as long as he can remember. They would creep up on him night after night like hungry wolves to tear at the seams of his psyche, channelling his own internal turmoils into visions that would not leave him to rest, even at the darkest points of the day cycle. Some of them were easier to forget than others, but most of the time, he would be able to shake off their haunting in the morning - with the exception of one dream that stuck with him.

He could recall each of its moments and intricacies more vividly than almost any real memories. He dreamt it soon after his throat plates were hardened as he was still nothing more but a hermit, hiding away from society in shame.

The dream would begin like all nightmares would - he found himself in a less-than-desirable situation. In his case, he found himself tied to the try that he was tied to when he was just a young child, forced to watch from a distance as flames began to light the village's centre with ill intent. However, in his dream, he was no longer a child - he was a young adult. The strength that he lacked to escape his confinement in his youth was nowhere to be seen as he began to tear at the rope with his jaw, biting and chattering his teeth until the material gave up under the assault. Once the first rope that was binding him was gone, he was able to tear off the rest. Now free, he began to sprint into his home at full speed. He had forsaken them once by his inability to be a good guard; he would NOT let it happen again...

As he ran closer and closer to the middle of the settlement, the buildings began to moan and crack under the assault of the flames. The wooden structures were easy prey to the apex predator that was fire, and the hay-made roofs were nothing but fuel to its anger. Bearohn did not care about his own safety as he approached, not even with the fact that he could feel the flames nipping in his direction and the smell of ash and burned meat invading his nose. He ran and ran, trying not to trip on his own feet until he reached the centre.

The somewhat large fire watch bell still stood proud in the middle of the agora, and he reached greedily to shake it violently, producing an ear-deafening sound with it.

"Fire! Get out! Get out of the village!" he yelled as loud as he could, trying to be louder than the roaring chaos around him. And yet, not a single soul appeared. In fact, in the blink of an eye, Bearohn found that the village around him had disappeared as a ring of fire now surrounded him. There was no way for him to even attempt to jump through its wall, as the blaze was standing so high that he swore it touched the very top of the Dome.

He froze in the middle, only his head moving as he tried to find a way out - only to see a rex made of flames suddenly manifest from the fire. It was a beast that Bearohn had never seen before. It was twice the size of a regular rexal, and its teeth were made out of chalked wood, and it drooled lava as it approached. Its eyes were hollow and dark, the only dark thing about the presence.

Bearohn steadied himself as he faced the creature, snarling at him out of animalistic instinct. And then the beast opened its mouth...

"You abandoned me, Bearohn..." it spoke with the voice of his early deceased mother, which sent shivers down his spine. The creature continued to approach slowly. "You left me to die..."

"I didn't! I tried to help you, but you were too sick. I walked to the hospitium every day to bring you medicine. I cooked and cared for you with what I had! May all Elders be witnesses. I tried!" Bearohn argued. This made the fire beast stop for a second, turning its head sideways before it would begin to approach again. This time, it spoke with his father's voice.

"You are nothing but a twig under the foot of pressure. You cannot even protect yourself; how could I have expected you to be able to protect an entire village. Look around you! All is aflame because of YOU!" It taunted Bearohn with no remorse. "You are a disappointment to me, son. You should have been the one to burn alive, and not me! Maybe then, this place would still be standing!"

At first, Bearohn could not help but deteriorate back to just a pup. Maybe his father was right... He should have been the one to burn. And then suddenly, anger awoke in his chest. Anger for all the harsh training he had to endure as a child, anger for his father pushing him to his limits, anger at the village for letting it happen...

"Fuck you! I did what I could. I was but a pup, trained like militia! Maybe if you were an actual father and maybe if you were a good leader, you would not have to resort to forcing your only child to stand guard against threats you knew he could not face!" Bearohn yelled back, his claws digging into the ground as he faced the fire-made rexal. "But I am not a pup anymore... And I am not afraid of you, or death..." he growled before he launched himself at the monster that stood before him, biting into its armour plate of fire to begin and try to tear it off. The flames burned his eyes, fur, and skin as he continued his assault, willing to consume the flame as much as it consumed him...

And then, he awoke.

ForgottenCerberus

Bearohn remembered the day when Agrippa scurried home with tearful eyes, locking herself into her remove and refusing to speak to him. She was bubbly and young at that time, but on that faithful day, Bearohn knew that it had changed. He had to talk to her, which he was sure of, but at first, he wanted to wait for her to come out of her shell. He was not one to pry, and if anything, he wanted to teach her that it was okay to be a recluse and to be alone if one needed to be alone.

However, when she did not come out of her room for the third day in a row, he knew he had to act. If she was an adult, he would have let her be, but alas, she was not. She was a child who had barely begun to grasp the world around her, someone who needed guidance. Avoiding all contact was a red flag, and Bearohn knew. She has not eaten anything, either. So, he decided to make some grilled fish for her before he gently knocked on her door while holding the plate.

No answer came, so he knocked again. This time he could hear the noise of something small shuffling about, but still no answer. He took a deep breath and slowly opened the door, only peaking his head inside first, his eyes scanning the room with care and worry. He could feel his own heart shatter as he noticed Agrippa curled up into a ball on her bed, silently weeping and shaking. Bearohn could no longer stay outside. He slowly walked into her room before gently closing the door behind him and placing the plate of fish on her table.

"What's wrong, little one?" He asked softly as he approached her bed. He could see that she was opening her mouth to speak but closed it quickly after another wave of tears started forming under her eyes, and the weeping began again. She tried to sniffle it away, but to no avail; she hiccuped and cried as Bearohn gently sat down at the edge of her bed and put a hand on her back, gently caressing her back as she suffered. It was...hard to watch for him. He wanted to speak to her; he wanted to tell her that everything was going to be okay. But at that moment, he had to realize that he could not do that. He would have lied by saying that, and he also realized that his wanting to speak was only to comfort himself in this situation. Of course, he wanted to help, but Agrippa needed something else right now, not words. If he were to speak, he feared that it would seem like it's not okay to cry and be sad, that it's a stage that one should get out of as soon as possible. But that's not what he wanted to show her.

He needed to let her cry.

Sadness and crying were part of life. It could last for a short or a long time, but it was part of their being, and he simply wanted to let her know that it was okay to do it. There was no shame in crying for days if one's heart was broken; there was no shame in being closed into a room, trying to find a mental respite out of it all. As gruelling as it was, he stayed silent, letting Agrippa weep until she was ready to speak.

After what felt like hours, her quiet voice has broken the silence.

"They...they made fun of me...", She whimpered, her entire body moving and trying to become smaller as spoke, which was impossible. "They said that...they don't want to play with me because...I can't see. And then they called me a mole and laughed!" by the end of this sentence, her voice tethering on silence as she began to gasp for air.

Bearohn sighed as he looked out the room of her window.

"What else did they say, little one?" He asked as he tried to form a plan in his head. This...this was something that he was afraid of. He knew damn well that Agrippa would not be welcomed by certain peers and that it would shatter her soul. But it was time to talk about how the world worked...

"They just...pushed me around a bit and walked away after", she admitted as she ever so slightly crawled closer to Bearohn. "I... I don't know what I did that they hate me so much. I just wanted to play. Why do I have to be blind?! What did I do to deserve it?!" her voice was now a mixture of anger and emotional agony, which, as weird as it sound, was a good sign. Anger was the force to clear the path of sadness so that happiness and joy may return.

Bearohn took a deep breath as he placed his hand on Agrippa's shoulder while looking down at her with a pained smile. He began to talk with a heavy heart.

"That's the thing, little one. You did not deserve it. You did not deserve any of it. And yet, you suffer. Day to day, you do and will. It was hard for me to swallow, but...life is not fair. It never will be. The ones who are the kindest and most giving souls will get trampled, broken, used, and no one will bat an eye. And the ones who are evil to the core? They can thrive without issues. I don't know what made life the way it is, little one. It is a struggle. What we can do is adapt to it. Like when you get a bad roll of the dice when we are playing games. You cannot change it, but you can work around it. Perhaps it was the Elders who made the world this way; perhaps it was something else that was even above them. But all we can do is...make the best of it." He smiled at Agrippa as he gently pinched her cheek. Her eyes were gazing into his, her little mind trying to process what Bearohn just said to her.

"Is there a point to being good?" She asked out of the blue. Her thought process was simple based on what she had been told. If even being good made you suffer, what was the point of it? She had not yet known that life was not simply black or white, but it was okay. At her age, the shades of existence were just beginning to appear.

"Honestly? I don't know. But what is good and what is bad is subjective. Walking in the forest can be good for you, but it can be bad for a bug that happens to find itself under your feet. You might not have intended to stomp on the bug, but it happened. Good and bad are... just as out of our reach as understanding life. What we can do, is to live our life the way we want to, despite it all. So what if they don't want to play with you? There will be others somewhere who will. There always are. Or, even better, grind it under their nose how much more fun you can have without them", Bearohn chuckled. "You don't choose the cards that life gives you, Agrippa. But you can always play with or around them. Never forget that."

Agrippa seemed to be deep in thought, but she soon sat up and cuddled next to Bear, pushing her head into his neck.

"Thanks, Captain", she chuckled weakly, the nickname making Bearohn roll his eyes.

"Anytime. I will teach you how to protect yourself soon enough, and then you can beat the shit out of them for teasing you", Bearohn said while laughing. "Now go get your food. I made you some fish; I know you have not eaten in days."

The way Agrippa perked up immediately made Bearohn feel quite joyful, and he watched with an amazed look on his as the young rexal slowly got up and headed towards her table to devour the meal.

ForgottenCerberus

Bear tensed up as he heard the sound of distant screams in the distance. As he looked up to the sky, he noticed the reason for it too; ebony smoke was flying towards the top of the Dome as if announcing the chaos that it was bringing to the peace. Bear did not hesitate after seeing it; he dropped to all fours and started sprinting towards the smoke's direction. As he did, the screams became louder, and soon the sound of fire gnawing at wood also joined the symphony of panic.

His eyes watered as he finally arrived at the small settlement, if it could have been considered one, being on fire. Rexals were rushing from left and right, carrying buckets in their hands and trying to drown the flames into submission. Some rexals were coughing and were laying on their side as others tended to their burn wounds, and some were crippled with fear. An elderly lady rexal's cries echoed through the sky as she cried about her husband, who was apparently buried under one of the buildings.

Bear did not hesitate; he jumped straight into action. He walked up to the well, ready to fill up all the water buckets he found to speed up the process of quenching the flames, when he noticed a small rexal from the corner of his eyes. It was a child, her sea glass coat tainted by the smoke and ash as she desperately dug through one of the collapsed buildings. The flames nearby were licking her back as she did so, burning her, but the little one kept digging as if she felt nothing despite all of it.

Bear quickly got to her before gently picking her up and dragging her away from the collapse.

She hit him as hard as she could as she tried to resist. "LET ME GO!" she cried before biting into Bear's arm full force, earning a hiss from him. He kept on dragging her towards the edge of the settlement where the smoke was not as drowning before gently putting her down and looking into her teary eyes.

"Hey, lass," he smiled gently as he looked at her back. At first glance, he could tell that it would leave an everlasting mark on her body, but despite everything, at least she would be alive to show it. The elders know what would have happened if he did not notice her; it would not have surprised him if she was dead by now, consumed by the flames due to her frantic search. "Are you alright? What were you looking for there?" He asked softly.

The tiny rexal sniffled as she pulled herself as small as possible, hiding her snout into her arms before responding.

"My parents were inside! " Bear sighed as he tore a piece of fabric off his tunic, dipped it in a nearby bucket of water, and gently laid on the child's back, who mewled out in pain. He tore another piece as he spoke to her in the softest voice possible.

"You sure they were in there?"

"I...I think..." The little rexal sobbed into her arm. Her voice was ragged and tired; perhaps the adrenaline had already started to leave her body.

"If you just think and don't know, they might still be around somewhere. We can look for them if you'd like." Bearohn offered as he gently lifted the hatchling's head with his fingers. He could not hide his surprise as he saw her clouded and bloodied eyes. The wound was fresh, no doubt, but he hoped he was wrong, assuming she was blinded. He gently took the fabric and asked her to close her eyes, which the sea glass-coloured child did without hesitation. He gently cleaned her face, and he could not help but tremble as she winced in pain.

'Poor kid', he thought to himself. 'So small and yet already carrying the weight of pain on her shoulders...'

After he was done, he placed the fabric back into the bucket of water before gently crouching in front of her.

"Come on, little lady, I'll carry you around and help find your papa and mama!" He said. Behind him, the small rexal immediately perked up and jumped on his back with such haste and force that it almost made the muscled adult tumble forward. "Bloody hell, kid, you have the force of a boar", He groaned as he proceeded to give her a piggyback ride and started walking around the edge of the village in hopes that she would be able to spot her parents amongst the living.

"What's your name, little one?" Bearohn asked as he walked towards the first group of rexals he saw, the ones who were treating one another with various burn wounds.

"Agrippa." She answered next to his ears. "And yours?"

"Bearohn", he grumbled back with a smile that Agrippa could not have seen. "You can call me Bear. Do you see your parents?" He asked as he stopped.

"I... I don't know..." Agrippa murmured as her voice became softer. "My eye hurts..." Bear tensed up as her words registered in his brain and realised he thought correctly when he assumed her eyesight was damaged. The question was, how much...

"What do you see, little one?" He asked carefully, and he could feel her wiggle a bit as she twisted her head around to try and get a good grasp on her surroundings.

"A lot of colourful clouds. Even you look like a cloud!" she exclaimed, not knowing that seeing nothing but clouds meant she was practically blind. It was no surprise; she was staring into the flames and hotness when Bear found her. The fire did not discriminate; instead of her life, it at least took her sight. This also meant that finding her parents would become an even more significant challenge.

"How do your pa and ma look like?" Bear asked as he looked back at her with a soft smile.

"Like me! Dad is very, very tall, like a tree! He is green like me and has a spot right here..." She pointed at the top of Bear's left ear. "And mom is...orange, like on my face!", She pointed at her own fisher's blush marking now, which Bear could barely see. "She also has a very cool scar on her nose," Agrippa added before resting her head on top of Bear's.

Bearohn quickly looked around but only found disappointment once he could not find the rexals who looked like her description. So, he walked more, listening to the young rexal on his back as she talked about her parents and later about how much her back hurt. In the end, he could not find them, and the painful sobbing of Agrippa was eating his nerves. Could they have really died in the fire? What was he supposed to say in a situation like this? He was not very good with breaking deaths to someone, let alone a child!

"Do you have anyone other than mommy and daddy?" He asked softly as he stopped at the very edge of the village, the sun already setting down.

"No...but my back really hurts..." She whispered. "I want to go home...I want my mom...and...dad", she sobbed a few seconds later.

"I know, little one, I know. But you cannot go home, I'm sorry. I know someone who might know where your parents are, though." Bear offered as he slowly started walking away from the village and towards the direction of Canto. Surely, The Elder would know what to do, and he was pretty close too, only half a day of walking, even with the kid on his back.

"Really?" Agrippa asked as she leaned down and hugged Bear's neck to the point where it almost made him gag. "Thank you, Bear!"

"Don't thank me just yet. If you can sleep, do it, there is a long road ahead of us. Maybe we'll find your parents along the way too." He suggested as he braced himself and let himself be guided by the lights of the ocean above the Dome. He had no idea at that time that she would become his adopted daughter later on.

ForgottenCerberus